SHORT FICTION - HERA ON A DIET

Not Vegan

Hera hastily opened the greasy wrapper of the burger and sunk her eager teeth into the sesame dotted bun. She picked up a bunch of fries, smothered it with ketchup, and swallowed everything with a sip of sweet tea. Nothing comforted Hera more than this divine combination of carb, fat, and protein, and indeed it made her double chin more defined and toned almost like a Greek statue. She swiped away a speck of ketchup dropped on her belly and vaguely remembered a time when her dress was several sizes smaller. Oh well, who needed to be that skinny anyway. She could still move around freely and had not destroyed any furniture nor paid for a second seat on the airplane. She had good friends, her husband loved her, and she was happy. What else did a woman need?

DEMI OF BALTIMORE

Demi of Baltimore

Today I want to rave about this restaurant I went to during my college senior year. It's a neat little place called Demi. I was having my winter blue back then, but eating here really cheered me up, and that's what matters the most to me. There's another restaurant named Crush at the upper level with its own charm as well, and I recommend both places. For now, I just focus on Demi. Everything about this place just screams for big success, from the wonderfully flavored and artistically presented dishes to the well decorated ambience and friendly services. I almost felt bad eating the food since everything looked so pretty. I remembered thinking how lovely the ingredients embraced and highlighted each other's flavors and textures. The waiter was informative about wine pairing, so the experience was definitely a blast. And yes, did I mention he looked cute too?

My "smart" phone put on a mentally-challenged fit and refused to work, so I guess putting some of the restaurant's own photos is the best way to show you what I'm talking about. I had some of the dishes shown below, and ate off the plates of my friends a bit too much more than what I should have, I think.

Orgasmic Pintxos

It's Pintxo Heaven.

Around this time last year I was strutting my stuffs on the Basque streets like a typical clueless tourist/student. The reason why I decided to go to San Sebastian was because of the food! And boy was I so grateful I made such a decision, it changed my life and touched my soul dramatically one dish at a time. The whole time I stayed there was just surreal. I remembered checking the clock all the time till I could run out of my class to go on my gourmet adventure. I even dated a waiter, that tells you how often I went to the pintxo bars.

The Basques love to eat, and good food and wine are their ways of life. The cuisine is emphasized on the quality of the ingredients; the harmony of taste, smell, and visual presentation; and above all, the passion and talent of the chefs. I often shiver with an almost orgasmic delight when a little bits of good food land on my lucky tongue, which happened almost all of the time when I was in Donostia. My Spanish was rusty no more when I came into a pintxo bar or restaurant to order what I want. They are pretty generous with wine, so I was always slightly intoxicated getting back to my rented apartment. Sometimes I stopped by the supermarket to stock up on the regional ham, cheese and black beer for a small snack before heading out to eat again.

Foie with Apple Sauce and Crushed Nuts

I ate a lot of foie gras, almost daily. I didn't turn into a fat cow, thanks mostly to the undying love of the kitchen lord. Even though Donostia has an efficient public transport system, I often walked my legs off since the city is very walkable. I remember resting on a bench at the Miramar Palace on the way back to Gros from my school near the Igara Tennis Club when I met my first Spanish lover of the summer.

But anyway, let's stick to foie gras, which I got the first bite when I was 16 during my first birthday celebration in the States, it got me hooked ever since. For about €3.00 to €5.00 a pintxo, or more for a racion, I got myself a good deal to nibble on daily. If you ask, I recommend you go to Iraeta's in Gros and ask for their Foie Gras in Caramelized Vodka, it's their signature dish. It was a fine balance of sweet and savory, and the moment the foie landed on my tongue, I swear to you, I almost creamed my pants. The foie with the pistachios you have seen above was taken from another bar somewhere in Parte Vieja that I couldn't remember the name though. 

Each bar has its own system of pricing. One of my favorite bars in Gros called Bar Bergara only charges €1.00 for any food item yet a lot more for a glass of wine. As seen below, the partially shown glass of white wine I got actually went very well with the crispy soft shelled crab and the croqueta de txipirones - fried squids on the bread. There was an either drunk or overtly excited old man to keep me company too. I learned Spanish through the people on the street even more so than that in class!

Crispy Soft-Shelled Crab and Fried Squids with Onions - Damn it I love Squids.

Bacon

I shiver with pleasure the moment I sink my teeth in you. Yes you, bacon you.

Coming straight out of the oven. That pepper is spicy and that grease is sweet, y'all.

So yeah, I blame my love for bacon on the sketchy brunches I had every weekend at Goucher college. I approached bacon with hesitation and wondering since there is no bacon back at the 'Nam where I came from. What started as a school-girl amazement now turns into some sorts of (un)healthy obsession. Well, I know it's bad for you, blah blah blah, but when you lather a cup of brown sugar and two table spoons of mesquite seasoning on it, put it in a 350 degree oven for half an hour, and listen to the bubbly noise of the caramelized sugar making sweet love to its crispiness, you know you can't resist.

My friend Rob and I used to have this ongoing joke about the love for bacon. One of my favorite has to come from The Oatmeal's 6 Reasons Why Bacon is Better Than True Love. Anyway I made a batch of the baked bacon mentioned above to feed my mom for lunch yesterday. I freaked out so much thinking about how much weight she would put on devouring so much bacon all at once like that. I felt obliged to make her green tea to calm her down after such bacon euphoria. I remember sending my friend Rob bacon chocolate bar with a side of green tea chocolate bar to neutralize the effect. Wow, I am so considerate. Oh, I dated a vegan kid several months ago. He fucked the last half a year of my life, so what works most effectively for vengeance? That's right, y'all. It's the bacon. I wish I could de-veganize (is this even a word?) him by stripping him off naked, forcing him to wear a bacon bra, and beating him up with a bacon whip. 

I got this awesome bacon bra from this guy's Flicker.

The British Canapes

They served these pretty little things during the royal wedding. I took these pretty photos from CNN's Eatocracy

1. Scottish Salmon Rose on Beetroot Bellini

2.Miniature Watercress and Asparagus Tart

3. Miniature Yorkshire Pudding with Roast Fillet of Beef and Horseradish Mousse